In interviews I usually ask a variant of this question:

What band would you most like to tour with

Out of all the people we interviewed NO ONE has ever said Three Days Grace, Buckcherry, or Nickelback. Do you know why? Because they suck. Yes, they sell out arenas, but an arena full of mouth breathing Corkys isn't the best endorsement. These three bands are like kryptonite for any band looking for any credibility. They are corporately produced slop and have single handedly ruined Rock N' Roll for today's youth. Where am I going with this? These bands are touring together.

That is right, fat girls with Playboy tattoos line up because Buckcherry is opening up for Nickelback. The ladies can seductively gyrate their cottage cheese ass while singing Crazy Bitch or Porn Star. But that is just the beginning, those same gigantic lard asses can sing along with Nickelback hits like Too Late, How You Remind Me, Too Late, and How You Remind Me.

Here are the tour dates in case you want to get your forklift license and drive your girlfriend to the show. Make sure you get the handicapped tickets, she won't fit in most seats.

Jul 10 - Mississippi Coast Coliseum - Biloxi, MS     
Jul 12 - Adado Riverfront Park - Lansing, MI     
Jul 14 - Chesaning Showboat Music - Chesaning, MI     
Jul 15 - Moondance Jam Festival - Walker, MN    
Jul 17 - Beartooth Rally - Red Lodge, MT   
Jul 20 - Club 101 - El Paso, TX     
Jul 21 - Lonestar Amphitheater - Lubbock, TX     
Jul 22 - Lake Afton - Goddard, KS     
Jul 24 - Sunken Gardens Amphitheatre - San Antonio, TX     
Jul 25 - Concrete Street Amphitheater - Corpus Christie, TX     
Jul 28 - Cabooze Parking Lot - Minneapolis, MN     
Jul 29 - North Dakota State Fair - Minot, ND    
Aug 07 - Canad Inns - Winnipeg, Manitoba, CA     
Aug 09 - Sturgis/Buffalo Chip Campground - Sturgis, SD    
Aug 14 - Willow Island - Madison, WI     
Aug 22 - First Midwest Bank Amphitheatre - Tinley Park, IL
Aug 28 - Rock Jam - Grand Junction, CO
Sep 02 - Modern Woodmen Park - Davenport, IA
Sep 11 - Verizon Wireless Music Center - Noblesville, IN

w/ Nickelback and Three Days Grace
Sept 14 - Bridgestone Arena - Nashville, TN
Sept 15 - Allen County War Memorial Coliseum - Ft. Wayne, IN
Sept 17 - Consol Energy Center - Pittsburgh, PA
Sept 18 - Joe Louis Arena - Detroit, MI
Sept 21 - HSBC Arena - Buffalo, NY
Sept 22 - Times Union Center - Albany, NY
Sept 24 - Comcast Center for the Performing Arts - Mansfield, MA
Sept 25 - Hersheypark Stadium - Hershey, PA
Sept 28 - Mohegan Sun Arena - Uncasville, CT
Sept 29 - Izod Center - East Rutherford, NJ
Oct 01 - Nationwide Arena - Columbus, OH
Oct 02 - Quicken Loans Arena - Cleveland, OH
Oct 08 - Rupp Arena - Lexington, KY
Oct 10 - Verizon Arena - Little Rock, AR
Oct 12 - New Orleans Arena - New Orleans, LA
Oct 15 - Cynthia W. Mitchell Pavilion - Spring, TX
Oct 16 - Ford Center - Oklahoma City, OK
Oct 18 - Pepsi Center - Denver, CO
Oct 20 - Energy Solution Arena - Salt Lake City, UT
Oct 22 - Honda Center - Anaheim, CA
Oct 23 - Arco Arena - Sacramento, CA
Oct 26 - Sleep Train Pavilion - Concord, CA
Oct 27 - Save Mart Center - Fresno, CA
Oct 29 - Cricket Wireless Pavilion - Phoenix, AZ
Oct 30 - MGM Grand Garden Arena - Las Vegas, NV