Part Three of Five with Rich Mullins from the Year Long Disaster
This is part three of five with Rich Mullins of the Year Long Disaster. The interview starts to take an evil downturn now. Here are parts one and two just to get you caught up on this debauchery.
BnR: We will have to get a follow up interview when you guys come to Philadelphia.
Rich: Philadelphia. City of Brotherly love. A city that just lost to the Pittsburgh Steelers 16-10. (Preseason game folks). We are really unpersonsable in person
BnR: I am sure with a little bit of alcohol you will be the most personable person in the room.
Rich: If I drink alcohol I am the least personable person in the room. Ask C.C. Deville.
BnR: If we have an interview with him, I will ask him about that experience.
Rich: You can ask him "What is it like to throw Rich Mullins out of your dressing room?"
BnR: After he gets done throwing us out of his dressing room, I will ask him that question.
Rich: You should be like "Seriously, the lollipop kids. You have to be that next Halloween. You could pull it off." If you got two midget dummies and some broomsticks and then connected them to his shoulders you could have like three. Then their legs would all kick at the same time.
BnR: I can see it now. Maybe we can have Bret Michaels be the Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz because of his hair extensions. We have to somehow work Michael Jackson in there from The Wiz.
Rich: No body wants to touch that guy. What is going on? I am sure he is paying people to touch him, but nobody wants to touch him for free anymore.
BnR: I don't even know what to say that because he is probably illegally touching someone right now.
Rich: No, where he is, it is legal. He moved to the heart of boy butthole touching. I am sure his city starts with the name Abu something or other.
BnR: That is right he did move to the middle east somewhere. That way he can wear a mask and no one will know it is him.
Rich: Well he basically is wearing a mask. It doesn't have any skin. Have you ever seen the move They Live with Roddy Roddy Piper? When you go to interview us next time, here is what you have to do. Daniel's godfather is John Carpenter. So he lived with John Carpenter for a long time. He got the Roddy Roddy Piper stories that are just through the roof. But back to the original point, Michael Jackson's face is like those aliens from They Live when they look through the sunglasses at them. I wonder what he looks like in the shower.
BnR: It is a sight I don't want to see.
Rich: But for your future notes the questions should go like this, Roddy Roddy Piper, Valium, hand gun.
BnR: Did you get to see one of his kilts?
Rich: I have not. But I got to touch and wear Snake Plissken's clothes. Not many people are that cool.
BnR: I am assuming you are not going to refer to Escape from LA. I don't think that movie existed.
Rich: I think that was a dark period that no one really needs to revisit. Why is Peter Fonda surfing on fire? But I can totally see the bong hits that inspired that happening. I am thinking :inhales: "Dude, what if we put Peter Fonda surfing on fire?" AWESOME! Alright that is a wrap. Let's set something else on fire.
BnR: Brilliant! Print! Going home to do more bong hits. Who are you more sadder to lose, George Carlin, Isaac Hayes, or Bernie Mac?
Rich: I didn't know any of them personally. George Carlin had some funny stuff. Bernie Mac, not so much to me. He had that moment where he was eating in Bad Santa, where I said "God this is one of the most disgusting things I've ever watched." So actually good riddance probably. I am sure his family thinks differently. I am going to go with Carlin.
BnR: Yes, but we threw Isaac Hayes in there for Escape from New York.
Rich: Yea, but I felt Isaac had a really good run. I feel like Carlin still had something to prove. He still owed me some comedy. I felt Isaac Hayes had the Theme from Shaft AND Escape from New York. There wasn't anywhere else for him to go; he was at the apex. All George had going for him was Bill and Ted. Yea he owes me. He left some cards on the table.
BnR: He needs to be reanimated.
Rich: Yea come back buddy. You owe us. You are not getting out of here this early.
BnR: I think we just wrote the next script for John Carpenter...reanimate George Carlin.
Rich: Not a bad idea. I think he's making a new movie. First one in seven years.
BnR: Wow, do you know the plotline? I am sure I can find out.
Rich: I think it is going to be Nicolas Cage is in a prison in Texas. Then he is going to surf fire through Texas.
BnR: I think that might have been done. It sounds very similar to Con Air. There is no wave surfing.
Rich: It is a bit like that, but different. It is like National Treasure meets Con Air meets Face Off.
BnR: And a lot of Nicholas Cage being Nicholas Cage.
Rich: You can count on fake hair and stumbling over some lines.
BnR: I don't even know how much of this is going on the website. It is just so ridiculous.
Rich: You can just stockpile footage.
BnR: It will be like a three part interview with Rich. [Little did I know we were going to continue for another 24 minutes]
Rich: I have a really good movie review that I use but it really works good when you talk About a Boy. If you ever have to write a movie review just say "I never wanted it to start." I feel that says it all.
BnR: We have a couple of album reviews. I might use your review. It can work for album reviews not just movie reviews.
Rich: I stayed up the other night writing complaint letters. I ordered this book off Amazon.com. I wrote them and it would be like 14 business days [to ship]. So I wrote to them on the 17th day and said "Where's my book?" I needed it for a tour and I wouldn't buy it off your stupid website if I could get it in stores. A woman was kind enough to write back and give me her name. Her name was Rachel. And she calmly wrote down and counted the business days for me. August 6th was the actual 14th business day.
We are honestly just getting started. There is still a fantastic Creed discussion and we revisit Michael Jackson. Part four will be on the site Friday, so if you are bored hanging out with your family, log on and read it. Audio below, be patient while it loads.
BnR: We will have to get a follow up interview when you guys come to Philadelphia.
Rich: Philadelphia. City of Brotherly love. A city that just lost to the Pittsburgh Steelers 16-10. (Preseason game folks). We are really unpersonsable in person
BnR: I am sure with a little bit of alcohol you will be the most personable person in the room.
Rich: If I drink alcohol I am the least personable person in the room. Ask C.C. Deville.
BnR: If we have an interview with him, I will ask him about that experience.
Rich: You can ask him "What is it like to throw Rich Mullins out of your dressing room?"
BnR: After he gets done throwing us out of his dressing room, I will ask him that question.
Rich: You should be like "Seriously, the lollipop kids. You have to be that next Halloween. You could pull it off." If you got two midget dummies and some broomsticks and then connected them to his shoulders you could have like three. Then their legs would all kick at the same time.
BnR: I can see it now. Maybe we can have Bret Michaels be the Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz because of his hair extensions. We have to somehow work Michael Jackson in there from The Wiz.
Rich: No body wants to touch that guy. What is going on? I am sure he is paying people to touch him, but nobody wants to touch him for free anymore.
BnR: I don't even know what to say that because he is probably illegally touching someone right now.
Rich: No, where he is, it is legal. He moved to the heart of boy butthole touching. I am sure his city starts with the name Abu something or other.
BnR: That is right he did move to the middle east somewhere. That way he can wear a mask and no one will know it is him.
Rich: Well he basically is wearing a mask. It doesn't have any skin. Have you ever seen the move They Live with Roddy Roddy Piper? When you go to interview us next time, here is what you have to do. Daniel's godfather is John Carpenter. So he lived with John Carpenter for a long time. He got the Roddy Roddy Piper stories that are just through the roof. But back to the original point, Michael Jackson's face is like those aliens from They Live when they look through the sunglasses at them. I wonder what he looks like in the shower.
BnR: It is a sight I don't want to see.
Rich: But for your future notes the questions should go like this, Roddy Roddy Piper, Valium, hand gun.
BnR: Did you get to see one of his kilts?
Rich: I have not. But I got to touch and wear Snake Plissken's clothes. Not many people are that cool.
BnR: I am assuming you are not going to refer to Escape from LA. I don't think that movie existed.
Rich: I think that was a dark period that no one really needs to revisit. Why is Peter Fonda surfing on fire? But I can totally see the bong hits that inspired that happening. I am thinking :inhales: "Dude, what if we put Peter Fonda surfing on fire?" AWESOME! Alright that is a wrap. Let's set something else on fire.
BnR: Brilliant! Print! Going home to do more bong hits. Who are you more sadder to lose, George Carlin, Isaac Hayes, or Bernie Mac?
Rich: I didn't know any of them personally. George Carlin had some funny stuff. Bernie Mac, not so much to me. He had that moment where he was eating in Bad Santa, where I said "God this is one of the most disgusting things I've ever watched." So actually good riddance probably. I am sure his family thinks differently. I am going to go with Carlin.
BnR: Yes, but we threw Isaac Hayes in there for Escape from New York.
Rich: Yea, but I felt Isaac had a really good run. I feel like Carlin still had something to prove. He still owed me some comedy. I felt Isaac Hayes had the Theme from Shaft AND Escape from New York. There wasn't anywhere else for him to go; he was at the apex. All George had going for him was Bill and Ted. Yea he owes me. He left some cards on the table.
BnR: He needs to be reanimated.
Rich: Yea come back buddy. You owe us. You are not getting out of here this early.
BnR: I think we just wrote the next script for John Carpenter...reanimate George Carlin.
Rich: Not a bad idea. I think he's making a new movie. First one in seven years.
BnR: Wow, do you know the plotline? I am sure I can find out.
Rich: I think it is going to be Nicolas Cage is in a prison in Texas. Then he is going to surf fire through Texas.
BnR: I think that might have been done. It sounds very similar to Con Air. There is no wave surfing.
Rich: It is a bit like that, but different. It is like National Treasure meets Con Air meets Face Off.
BnR: And a lot of Nicholas Cage being Nicholas Cage.
Rich: You can count on fake hair and stumbling over some lines.
BnR: I don't even know how much of this is going on the website. It is just so ridiculous.
Rich: You can just stockpile footage.
BnR: It will be like a three part interview with Rich. [Little did I know we were going to continue for another 24 minutes]
Rich: I have a really good movie review that I use but it really works good when you talk About a Boy. If you ever have to write a movie review just say "I never wanted it to start." I feel that says it all.
BnR: We have a couple of album reviews. I might use your review. It can work for album reviews not just movie reviews.
Rich: I stayed up the other night writing complaint letters. I ordered this book off Amazon.com. I wrote them and it would be like 14 business days [to ship]. So I wrote to them on the 17th day and said "Where's my book?" I needed it for a tour and I wouldn't buy it off your stupid website if I could get it in stores. A woman was kind enough to write back and give me her name. Her name was Rachel. And she calmly wrote down and counted the business days for me. August 6th was the actual 14th business day.
We are honestly just getting started. There is still a fantastic Creed discussion and we revisit Michael Jackson. Part four will be on the site Friday, so if you are bored hanging out with your family, log on and read it. Audio below, be patient while it loads.
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