Scientists are baffled today at the face that seemingly successful woman have an uncontrollable urge to have sex with Travis Barker.  The lineup reads like the batting order for the All-Herpes Softball Classic team:  Shanna Moakler, Kim Kardashian, and Paris Hilton. 

A couple of days ago, Barker's ex-wife (former Miss USA) Moakler, threw a drink on Kardashian at a party, accusing her of sleeping with Barker, back in the proverbial day.  While no Bn'R representatives were live on the scene, our angry German correspondent Heinreich Von Wettner was there to speak with other guests.  Apparently Kardashian was spared from any long term damages from the drink being thrown on her.  It seems that her ass threw itself in front of the drink before it could harm her face.  As we all know, Kim's ass is used to taking brutal damage...just ask Ray J. and Reggie Bush (oh snap!!!)

What is it about Mr. Barker that gets him this much tail?  He looks like a cigarette dipped in olive oil and I'm sure he smells about the same.  Oh well Travis, I guess keep doing what you're doing.  There are 17 year olds in Burbank who are living vicariously through you and your inability to contract STDs.