The Central New York NBC something or other is reporting that the lead singer of Barenaked Ladies has been charged with drug possession.

The Manlius Police Department reports that they have arrested three people in connection with an alleged drug incident in the early hours of Friday, July 11 in the Village of Fayetteville. Police tell Action News that 38-year-old Steven Page of Toronto, Canada has been charged with fourth degree criminal possession of a controlled substance, a felony. Also, 25-year-old Stephanie M. Ford of 311 East Genesee Street has been charged with the same felony in addition to unlawful possession of marijuana. Police tell us that during the arrest Ford identified Page as a singer and guitarist in the rock group "Barenaked Ladies", which Page subsequently confirmed.
 
First of all I commend him on having a 25 yr old groupie. However, this story is a bit strange. The police noticed a car, in a driveway, with the door open. The Police checked the car, which was unoccupied, then checked the house where the car was sitting and then the neighborhood. While checking the neighborhood for the owner of the car, this is when they came across two people (Ford and Page) sitting at the kitchen table with what appeared to be cocaine on the table. When Ford and Page saw the police they covered the substance.
 
Ok so here is my version of the events, which means it didn't happen, but how I want to think it happened.
 
Page: Hey I am in Barenaked Ladies. I am the emo-looking frontman who wrote "If I had a million dollars." Well I do have a million dollars so do you want to party?
 
Ford: Hell yeah, but I only party with guys who look like Daniel Baldwin and who keep me heavily supplied with Columbian nose candy.
 
Page: I am not really into drugs. But in Canada I am referred to as the Rivers Cuomo of college rock. Doesn't that mean anything? I also have two Grammy nominations, an MTV Video Award, three Gold records, and two platinum records. Doesn't this sound awesome?
 
Ford: You don't look like Daniel Baldwin and you don't look like you have any powder for my nose. Plus the Grammy's are a sham.
 
Page:  Fine. If I got some coke, would you party with me?
 
Ford: You have coke? Awesome let's party!
 
::partying with coke on the kitchen table with the windows open. Page has never done illicit activity before so he doesn't know to shut the blinds. He was clearly goaded into this by an attractive, young, harpy.::
 
Ford: Game over Canadian Cuomo, the pigs are here. Put the wet towel over the coke we can dry the coke out of the towel later and mainline it if we have to.
 
Page:  [staring at her voluptuous breasts] Yea
 
Police: Police! Open up we have seen what appears to be a controlled substance on your table and we have the right to search your domicile.
 
Page lets the Policia into the abode where they find the cocaine.
 
Ford: You mother fuckers get out of here! Do you know who this is? Do you know who you are illegally searching? This is the Canadian Weezer. 
 
Police:  Ma'am calm down, we are protecting the public here by searching your house for substances that only harm those who ingest them. We are making the world safer by searching this house. Besides, we hate Weezer.
 
Ford: Oh, did I say Weezer? I meant Barenaked Ladies. He has a million dollars. Would you leave him alone then?
 
Police:  Are you in Barenaked Ladies?
 
Page:  Yes.
 
Police:  You are still under arrest.
 
Page:  I just wanted some cheap tail and now I have this shit to worry about. I should have introduced her to the real Daniel Baldwin, but he is hanging out with dumb blondes who reference Perez Hilton and have voice modulation problems when gakked out on spank after a Dirty Pearls show. Damn you Daniel Baldwin!