I found this report and it is too awesome NOT to post. I have no idea if the bands are decent, awesome, or absolutely terrible. But I like to judge bands based on their names. Generally if they spent more than three seconds on their name, they suck. But here is the report.

Minnesota’s “porno grind retards,” ANAL BLAST have released details for a contest in promotion for their final east coast Hammer Smashed Cunt Tour 2008. They are looking for artwork to be used on official ANAL BLAST merchandise.

“Winners will actually be allowed to travel with the band on tour, molest girls, drink until near death on our tab, as well as win a ton of free merch for your cd and shirt collection!”

Details can be found at the band’s official MySpace page located here.

Initial tour dates include:

February 22 - Providence, RI @ the Jeepshop w/ Sexcrement, Goreality
February 23 - Cortland Manor, NY @ Popeyes Pub w/ Mortal Decay, Malignancy
February 24 - The NYDM Whore Wars (Philly Steak & Yeast area, NY)
February 28 - Jacksonville, FL @ the Pit w/ Cystic Dysentery, Queef Huffer