If you have been to the dentist in the last half decade then you have been subjected to Rod Stewart's latest assault on dignity, his adult contemporary phase. Indeed, Rod's American Songbook albums sound so tame, safe and unoffensive that they represent a bold affront to everything Blogs N Roses represents. This sort of shameless, faceless corporate pandering should come as no surprise, as Rod has adapted his raspy golden pipes to whatever shameless, faceless corporate trend that has come to pass in the last 30 years (not to mention that he makes the Jeff Beck Group unlistenable, much to the chagrin of young, impressionable jazz/fusion guitarists).

In a way this new monument to mediocrity has filled a great void in modern life. Rod's cover of "Have You Ever Seen the Rain" has given the pain of an over-paid dental hygienist probing your mouth a new offensively bland soundtrack. This track is so insipid and devoid of human emotion that the original Creedence rendition sounds like The Sex Pistols in comparison. Do yourself a favor, go listen to The Faces' "A Nod Is as Good as a Wink...to a Blind Horse," and flash back to an age when Rod Stewart and Ron Wood didn't suck dick (literally for the former, figuratively for the latter).

And now for your viewing pleasure I present "the beginning of the end." What was once the abyss can now be described as the only the edge of the cliff to Rod's new nadir.